12.04.2011

The Time is NOW!

When men say NO to bullying, of any kind, the world will be joyous for boys and girls like this boy here.

This is my story, too. From as young as I can remember to 28 years old I was bullied by boys, girls, men and women. I looked like a happy boy to my parents, but at school, I was just trying to survive.

Is this what we want for our children?

When I invite you to the ManKind Project's New Warrior Training Adventure, it's not to get anything from you or convince you of anything. I do it because men can save the world, if they choose to do that. You are the man we need to stand with us and say the time is NOW!

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf






12.01.2011

In Stronger Service to the World

I have people ask me about my men's group quite often....What is it? What do you do? Why? Here's great piece of text that helps explain a ManKind Project men's IGroup.

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf






Guiding Principles of a Men’s Group
By Owen Marcus

Circle of Brothers

We live a new vision of being a man. Through ceremony and practice, we initiate each man deeper into full maturity. Going beyond friends, we develop the intimacy that only comes from integrity. The wholeness that occurs from each man being a leader connecting to something beyond himself creates a group of sustaining success in all aspects of life.

Fierce Love

We challenge and support each other, often in the same breath. The energy created is palpable, able to penetrate deflection. We care and feel “sweetly held” by each other. We are willing to give our love freely. We offer each other our compassionate truth. We name the unspoken and are willing to put relationships at risk for the sake of truth and growth. We create the energy necessary to constantly become superior men.

Our Container
In the sanctuary of the group, we maintain safety and complete confidentiality – which raises the bar to be free in the circle. We hold ourselves, and each other, to our individual and collective commitments. We ask for what we want. We honor and value each other, often with laughter and tears. We ‘let it rip’ with purpose and vision. With our intuition and love, we sense the dissonance and deflect the deflection. Through our ability to be present with others and ourselves, we accept that we sit in a ‘circle of mirrors’ feeling how truth resonates through the circle.

Bringing Our Full Self
We share from our gut, heart, and full body. We are willing to go “all in”. We are open to the moment, with unguarded humbleness. We move into our bodies, bringing a willingness to reveal and express our feelings. We surrender into feeling, owning our emotions. We tap the richness of our unconscious and our dark side and manifest that energy into positive awareness and action. We value depth over breadth. We step into our fear, risk vulnerability and move forward without collapsing. We notice and appreciate what is working in our lives. We courageously bring our unguarded optimism and affirm our ability to manifest our intentions.

What We Bring Into the World
We gain energy in our time together, each carrying this energy back into his life. We feel deep gratitude and see more beauty in the world. We feel a stronger connection to ourselves, to our surroundings, and to our environment. We accelerate change in our lives and step clear of victimhood. We feel a stronger connection to ourselves, our family and community, and a deeper connection to our sexuality. Our lives are improved and we stand in stronger service to the world. We offer this love to our planet as the seed for the change we model.

11.19.2011

Journey to Manhood

From A Journey to the Wilderness of the Soul, by Larry Pesavento

"Manhood demands a journey. Manhood demands a test, not testosterone. Manhood does not come automatically, growing as the body grows. This journey of manhood is perilous and painful. The outcome cannot be planned or controlled, and is shrouded in paradox. The journey must be done with a man's eyes open, consciously and continually choosing a path that leads away from the familiar and the secure.

The journey is a psychospiritual one that demands modern man's attention. Society's and the world's survival depends on men consciously taking up this mission toward inner wisdom and purpose. Men who do not take the journey are dangerous men. Burned out men are dangerous men."






Listen, the way I see it is that men are left behind to find their way from boyhood to manhood without a path. Well, no path that I wanted, anyway.

No woman, no TV show, no movie, and no book is going to take you down the path to manhood. Men help boys, young men, and other men to step cleanly into manhood; simple as that. It is not easy. It requires you look at where you are and it requires you to walk away from being a child.

There are men who are willing to lead men to manhood; they are ManKind Project men. They are men who see the value in you; in your future contribution or destruction to the planet; in your participation in society, or lack of; in your heart.

Is today the day your say to yourself "I need to be among men who will guide me, listen to me, honor me, care about me, challenge me and everything I have going"?

Step up, men are waiting.

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf

11.07.2011

Once in a Life

"Once in a life, you can find a time to see,
And you get to turn it down, turn around, temporary sanity
And then the mountain disappears without a trace,
All it took, was a sudden leap of faith."

Kenny Loggins, Leap of Faith

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I had this time in my life; where I had to gather my courage and make the leap.

The leap was gigantic. I had to summon up all my courage to dive into a men's organization that didn't make the rules for me. The ManKind Project doesn't tell me the rules for my life, I have to make them for myself. There are men to support my decisions; but none to tell me what to do.

I made the leap and now I am grateful to the men who held out their arms to catch me, stand me up, and say "now do it for yourself."

Will you leap? There are over 45,000 men there to catch you, me included.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf

10.27.2011

Active Men

Having a blog, I allow comments to be added. However, I don't allow them to be posted freely, but rather, I moderate them. There are a lot of reasons for this but the biggest is that this is my blog and I get to choose what gets posted.

I have a message to get across to you and that is that the ManKind Project and the New Warrior Training Adventure are worthwhile male endeavors that create a better man and therefore a better world. If a comment is posted that I feel doesn't stay on topic, then I get to delete it. I try to post all comments, but occasionally someone decides to anonymously post a bunch of garbage that is either off topic or some kind of slam to what I am trying to accomplish here.

Recently, I got four such e-mails that were counter-productive to my message and they were anonymous. Rather than just blow them off I feel compelled to do them some justice as at least one had a thought worth addressing.

I state that over 40,000 men have taken the New Warrior Training Adventure weekend. That number climbs every weekend and if I had way to add a ticker to the exact count I would. The commenter stated to me that 40,000 men were not active in ManKind Project and that some other number was. Their number was ridiculously low and not worth even stating. However, it is worth looking at how many men are "active" in ManKind Project.

In my opinion...every single man is. The ManKind Project changes men's lives just by attending the New Warrior Training Adventure. Some men choose to not "actively" participate in the ManKind Project after the New Warrior Training Adventure, but from my seat that is moot. Men are changed by the training weekend. Whether they continue to sit in an iGroup, or continue to attend other ManKind Project trainings and events, or not, is not important. These men have walked through a weekend they will never forget. It's that simple.

I do not have a number for how many men stay active in the ManKind Project after the New Warrior Training Adventure. I have no way to decide what active is except as I stated above.

I tell you this. The training is strong, challenging, and worth it.

To the commenter that sent me four anonymous comments last week, I will continue to post only what stays on topic and much of what you wrote (much of which I could not decipher the context or grammar) was not on topic.

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf

10.10.2011

Another View

I love when men post on the Internet about the New Warrior Training Adventure. I found this great post and wanted you to see, from a clinical psychologist's point of view, what the training looks like.

Are you ready?



I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf




The ManKind Project

August 30, 2011 By Dr. Adam Sheck

I’m writing this post on a Monday morning, following an intense men’s weekend training I completed last night sponsored by The ManKind Project. It is called the New Warrior’s Training Adventure (NWTA) and it definitely was an “adventure” that pushed my physical, emotional and spiritual limits.

The purpose of this post is as much for me to integrate the weekend experience as it is to share what might be a beneficial experience for other men. This is actually “Part 2″. You can read “Part 1″ here, which began by setting the context of my previous experience of “men’s work.”

The New Warrior Training Adventure is a journey that begins on a Friday evening and ends about forty-eight hours later on a Sunday evening. Time becomes frozen in this intense experience which felt to me more like a week or even longer. The thirty men who participated with me as well as the staff for the weekend transformed from strangers to brothers as we bonded during a common experience.

I won’t describe the specifics of the weekend, as I want to respect the privacy of my fellows, but I shall certainly share my experience and growth. The NWTA draws on a myriad of male traditions, from the militaristic to the mythopoetic to the Native American to the psychological and archetypal. It challenged me in ALL aspects of my manhood. The challenge was to grow, to release what was holding me back from stepping into MY manhood and MY power.

In the early 1980s, I was a workshop junkie and did every seminar and weekend workshop that I could find in that period of self-actualization. I only say this to let you know that I don’t want to sound like a groupie and I don’t want to sound like I’m proselytizing. Been there, done that, BOUGHT the Tee-Shirt Factory! This isn’t a paid endorsement and I don’t get a kickback from The ManKind Project.

It actually took me four years from the time I first heard about them to doing the training. The timing was right. My life was/is in an existential transition as my daughter recently graduated from high school, my business is in a lull and I’m ready to recreate myself and my life’s work.

As a man who was raised without a father, I have lived and worked on my father wound for a long time. The NWTA was another huge part of healing that wound. It truly is in the company of men that men can help to contextualize that loss and find greater peace, comfort and wholeness. Historically men come together in war and conflict. This weekend experience was antithetical to this as we came together on a mission of peace, truth, connection, respect, love and healing.

Psychotherapy, though started by men, has become in my opinion very feminized. I bring a strong masculine aspect into my work as a psychotherapist and also bring the masculine into the training I do with psychology interns. Most of my interns are women, yet they welcome the permission and direction to actually challenge their clients and be more than a “how does that make you feel” therapist.

Yes, we need the feminine aspect in our lives, there is no question about that. However, we also need the masculine aspect. We ALL, men and women, need to create a balance between our internal masculine and feminine. The NWTA helps to realign the masculine and strengthen what has been weakened or never developed.

Through a series of carefully sequenced processes, our group walked through our wounds and our shadows. I became more aware of those hidden, buried parts of myself as they surfaced.

For those who are afraid that those shadow parts are only our negative aspects, let me say that isn’t the truth. I have done a lot of work over the years to understand the negative, repressed parts of my psyche. A big part of this weekend was to identify and begin to liberate the hidden HEALTHY parts!

I connected to that deep, primordial core of my manhood. Being raised by mainly by women, I didn’t have access to large parts of my masculine energies and honestly, a lot of them were discouraged. I can still remember my mother saying “modulate your voice!” And so we bury parts of ourselves or they come out in a rebellious form with a vengeance.

So I connected experientially with my core, with my power, with my vitality, with my guts! In some ways, I “remembered” who I am and where I came from as a man. I also reconnected to the “mission” in my life.

As I’ve written before, as a “man after fifty” I have been on the existential fence with life life. My daughter is almost eighteen, has graduated from high school and will be entering the Air Force soon. My daughter will be launched and my responsibilities as a ”single parent” will substantially change.

The truth is that I have a great deal of freedom and incredible options for how I can lead my life. And so I have been seeking to redefine my purpose, to recreate my life for this next period. In short, I have been seeking my “mission”.

A major part of the NWTA is focused on helping men connect to their “mission” and so I was delighted that the processes helped me to reveal mine:

“I create a world of playful connection by sharing who I am.”

A mission is short and sweet and when you uncover it, it just “clicks” and perhaps brings an “aha” and a smile to your lips. It’s not about a “business plan” or the like. My mission is definitely in alignment with my work as a psychologist.

My work IS to help people connect and I believe that the healing component of psychotherapy IS in that sharing of who we are. I am direct, confrontational AND kind in my work with couples, individuals and groups. AND, because the work is so “serious” I have always done my best to make it playful and laugh about it to create balance in the energies.

So discovering my mission was/is an affirmation of my career path. The part that I need to personally work on is creating more of that playful connection in my personal life. And even more, learning to be KIND to myself. That is my “assignment” for the week, to discover ways to be kind to myself. And part of being kind right now is to wrap up this post and spend some time outside!

To summarize then, the two big takeaways for me from the NWTA weekend were reconnecting to my inner core and power and gaining clarity into my mission. There was much more, yet those are the big two for me as of today. The weekend was so intense and time-compacted that I have no doubt that more epiphanies and insights will be coming down the road.

To be clear, it isn’t psychotherapy, it’s not conducted by licensed therapists. And yet there is a freedom in not being licensed that allows the NWTA to push the envelope and create a deep, healing experience that isn’t possible in psychotherapy. One doesn’t preclude the other and both are important ways to create healing and freedom to connect to and express who you truly are and have a greater quality of life for yourself and your community.

It’s an intense training that will push you to your limit. It’s not for the faint of heart. If you are under any kind of psychological treatment, ABSOLUTELY clear it with your therapist first.

That’s about all that I have to say right now, I’m OUT THE DOOR! If you want to find out more, you may click The ManKind Project link at the beginning of this post. And of course, I’m happy to answer any questions you may have about it or my work if you just Click Here.

Thank you so much.

9.27.2011

Blame

"All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you. The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for external reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration. You may succeed in making another feel guilty about something by blaming him, but you won't succeed in changing whatever it is about you that is making you unhappy."

Dr. Wayne Dyer




You can blame all you want, but you are in charge of your life. Does that seem like news to you?

There's no one who is more in charge of your world than you. If your world isn't working, the burden is on you to change it. Yes, it may be really hard. Is your life worth doing something really hard?

In the New Warrior Training Adventure, and in the ManKind Project in general, we help you look at how you show up in your life and how you can take accountability for your choices.

Is that for you?

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf

9.15.2011

Breathing

There is a space between each breath out and each breath in where I choose life. It is also the space where change is made.

I can choose to breathe in change, or not. I can choose to breath in the same old way of thinking and being and doing, or not.

Same old, same old? Enough.

How about you? Ready for something new?

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf

9.11.2011

9.11 10 Years On

I remember.

3057 and all their relatives and relations.

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf

9.02.2011

A Man Tells About His NWTA

If you are intrerested in the New Warrior Training Adventure, give this really really great blog post a read. Dr. Adam Sheck is a clinical psychologist and couples counselor in Los Angeles and the creator of the Men After Fifty Community.

Enjoy the read below or here.

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf



The ManKind Project

August 30, 2011 By

I’m writing this post on a Monday morning, following an intense men’s weekend training I completed last night sponsored by The ManKind Project. It is called the New Warrior’s Training Adventure (NWTA) and it definitely was an “adventure” that pushed my physical, emotional and spiritual limits.

The purpose of this post is as much for me to integrate the weekend experience as it is to share what might be a beneficial experience for other men. This is actually “Part 2″. You can read “Part 1″ here, which began by setting the context of my previous experience of “men’s work.”

The New Warrior Training Adventure is a journey that begins on a Friday evening and ends about forty-eight hours later on a Sunday evening. Time becomes frozen in this intense experience which felt to me more like a week or even longer. The thirty men who participated with me as well as the staff for the weekend transformed from strangers to brothers as we bonded during a common experience.

I won’t describe the specifics of the weekend, as I want to respect the privacy of my fellows, but I shall certainly share my experience and growth. The NWTA draws on a myriad of male traditions, from the militaristic to the mythopoetic to the Native American to the psychological and archetypal. It challenged me in ALL aspects of my manhood. The challenge was to grow, to release what was holding me back from stepping into MY manhood and MY power.

In the early 1980s, I was a workshop junkie and did every seminar and weekend workshop that I could find in that period of self-actualization. I only say this to let you know that I don’t want to sound like a groupie and I don’t want to sound like I’m proselytizing. Been there, done that, BOUGHT the Tee-Shirt Factory! This isn’t a paid endorsement and I don’t get a kickback from The ManKind Project.

It actually took me four years from the time I first heard about them to doing the training. The timing was right. My life was/is in an existential transition as my daughter recently graduated from high school, my business is in a lull and I’m ready to recreate myself and my life’s work.

As a man who was raised without a father, I have lived and worked on my father wound for a long time. The NWTA was another huge part of healing that wound. It truly is in the company of men that men can help to contextualize that loss and find greater peace, comfort and wholeness. Historically men come together in war and conflict. This weekend experience was antithetical to this as we came together on a mission of peace, truth, connection, respect, love and healing.

Psychotherapy, though started by men, has become in my opinion very feminized. I bring a strong masculine aspect into my work as a psychotherapist and also bring the masculine into the training I do with psychology interns. Most of my interns are women, yet they welcome the permission and direction to actually challenge their clients and be more than a “how does that make you feel” therapist.

Yes, we need the feminine aspect in our lives, there is no question about that. However, we also need the masculine aspect. We ALL, men and women, need to create a balance between our internal masculine and feminine. The NWTA helps to realign the masculine and strengthen what has been weakened or never developed.

Through a series of carefully sequenced processes, our group walked through our wounds and our shadows. I became more aware of those hidden, buried parts of myself as they surfaced.

For those who are afraid that those shadow parts are only our negative aspects, let me say that isn’t the truth. I have done a lot of work over the years to understand the negative, repressed parts of my psyche. A big part of this weekend was to identify and begin to liberate the hidden HEALTHY parts!

I connected to that deep, primordial core of my manhood. Being raised by mainly by women, I didn’t have access to large parts of my masculine energies and honestly, a lot of them were discouraged. I can still remember my mother saying “modulate your voice!” And so we bury parts of ourselves or they come out in a rebellious form with a vengeance.

So I connected experientially with my core, with my power, with my vitality, with my guts! In some ways, I “remembered” who I am and where I came from as a man. I also reconnected to the “mission” in my life.

As I’ve written before, as a “man after fifty” I have been on the existential fence with life life. My daughter is almost eighteen, has graduated from high school and will be entering the Air Force soon. My daughter will be launched and my responsibilities as a ”single parent” will substantially change.

The truth is that I have a great deal of freedom and incredible options for how I can lead my life. And so I have been seeking to redefine my purpose, to recreate my life for this next period. In short, I have been seeking my “mission”.

A major part of the NWTA is focused on helping men connect to their “mission” and so I was delighted that the processes helped me to reveal mine:

“I create a world of playful connection by sharing who I am.”

A mission is short and sweet and when you uncover it, it just “clicks” and perhaps brings an “aha” and a smile to your lips. It’s not about a “business plan” or the like. My mission is definitely in alignment with my work as a psychologist.

My work IS to help people connect and I believe that the healing component of psychotherapy IS in that sharing of who we are. I am direct, confrontational AND kind in my work with couples, individuals and groups. AND, because the work is so “serious” I have always done my best to make it playful and laugh about it to create balance in the energies.

So discovering my mission was/is an affirmation of my career path. The part that I need to personally work on is creating more of that playful connection in my personal life. And even more, learning to be KIND to myself. That is my “assignment” for the week, to discover ways to be kind to myself. And part of being kind right now is to wrap up this post and spend some time outside!

To summarize then, the two big takeaways for me from the NWTA weekend were reconnecting to my inner core and power and gaining clarity into my mission. There was much more, yet those are the big two for me as of today. The weekend was so intense and time-compacted that I have no doubt that more epiphanies and insights will be coming down the road.

To be clear, it isn’t psychotherapy, it’s not conducted by licensed therapists. And yet there is a freedom in not being licensed that allows the NWTA to push the envelope and create a deep, healing experience that isn’t possible in psychotherapy. One doesn’t preclude the other and both are important ways to create healing and freedom to connect to and express who you truly are and have a greater quality of life for yourself and your community.

It’s an intense training that will push you to your limit. It’s not for the faint of heart. If you are under any kind of psychological treatment, ABSOLUTELY clear it with your therapist first.

That’s about all that I have to say right now, I’m OUT THE DOOR! If you want to find out more, you may click The ManKind Project link at the beginning of this post. And of course, I’m happy to answer any questions you may have about it or my work if you just Click Here.

Thank you so much,

Dr. Adam Sheck


8.23.2011

Until I Listen

"You'll never find
Peace of mind
Till you listen to your heart"

From Kissing a Fool, by George Michael off the Faith CD, 1987




I am not going to find piece of mind until I listen to my heart. Will you?

What does your heart say to you when you look at where you are in you life?
When I listen to mine, it is longing to tell you that men in the ManKind Project are just men looking to listen to their hearts. Do they always listen...no...but they continue to work the idea.

I am asking you to listen to your heart. Is it longing for a change, for a different beat, for what?

Come do the New Warrior Training Adventure and see if you can hear your heart after that. I bet you can.

I'm out.
Bravehearted Old-faithful Wolf