Shadows in Our Bag

Doing shadow work is part of the work we do in the ManKind Project. We look a the parts of us that we repress, deny or hide; the parts that we may not even know are driving us.

As Robert Bly states in his book the A Little Book on the Human Shadow, the shadow is the "the long bag we drag behind us." It is filled with all the things we are told, or choose, to hide or deny about ourselves so we can be in the world as we perceive it to be. We tote it around and sometimes bits get out and take over our life while we are not begin attentive.

Getting to know our shadows helps us bring them out of the bag and into the light where we can honor them and understand their power. Sometimes this can completely defuse their power or it can bring them to a place where we can be more conscious of them and work with them.

We all carry shadows in our bag; how we deal with them makes the difference.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Greater Than the Fear

My vision is this; every man attends the training on the same weekend. I guarantee you that you would wake up to a world that you cannot imagine.

I know logistically that isn't possible, but for the sake of my vision, bear with me.

Let's try to imagine this.

How about a world where men take responsibility for not just few things but every thing in their life. It's is no longer someone else's fault that a man's life is the way it is.

How about a world where men respect themselves so much they would not consider disrespecting anyone else.

How about a world where men sit down and clear up the issues between them so cleanly that war is never again a thought.

How about a world where men love and listen and care and stand firm and draw legitimate boundaries and hold space for others to do the same.

My mission to get the word out about the ManKind Project is greater than the fear that I will be judged for it. So, I keep doing it because it is worth it.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Stand in the Fire with This Man

This post is a poem by a ManKind Project man. I think he speaks about giving to the man you are the honor, validation, and acceptance you need.

What will you do today to honor, validate, and accept the man you are?

Will it be to grab up your courage to stand in the fire with this man and attend the next New Warrior Training Adventure near you?

I hope so.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf

This Man
By Joe Fernandez; Winged Panther; Camp Krem, May 2002
(written March 2003)

This Man

who you have long neglected
and left

It is time
to set things right.

Look deep into him
into his face
into his eyes
into his soul.

And really SEE
what you've been missing.

How could you not have seen
his beauty
his intelligence
his power.

How could you not honor
the truth of his heart
the kindness of his words
the courage of his actions.

How could you not bless
his willingness to struggle
his hunger to learn
his will to live.

Behold his gifts.
Honor them.

Encourage him
to spread those gifts
far and wide.

Let him know
beyond a shadow of a doubt,
that he is loved
for all time
fully and completely
without exception.

He craves your love
your acceptance
your blessings.

This man
who stands before you
in the mirror.


The Time is Now

Today.... a video for the next NWTA in Kentucky, USA. I really like the music and the message.

Download it here.

What are you waiting for? Today is the day to start anew.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Staffing the NCal November NWTA, Part 3

An on-going series of posts around my staffing of the next MKP NWTA in Northern California. I thought it would be interesting and enlightening to follow how this all works and you'll get to ride along on what it looks like to put on an NWTA from one man's experience...mine.

I try to spend a bit of time each day envisioning the men who are coming to the training. I see them wondering what is to come; wondering if they should sign up or cancel out of fear; scouring the Internet for a clues as to what to do, as if the answer were outside them somewhere. I see each man get some piece of "newness," joy, wonder, clarity, or break-through. I see them holding their excuses close to heart as if they will comfort them any further.

What will the training bring for them? What would it bring to you?

See you in part 4!

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Journey of Tears; We Will Not Turn Away

This post is particularly wonderful. A ManKind Project man in the Northern California center wrote this wonderful piece. I urge you to read the entire piece.

This post goes well with my on-going posts on staffing the November Northern California NWTA.

In his words:

"I wrote this immediately after my first staffing. My rookie staffing (9-03) was TEN TIMES more powerful than my “going thru” in 9-02...It was the most healing event of my life, as I finally realized that I now had the opportunity to step beyond and truly make a difference, and have a legacy of doing something truly worthwhile rather than simply living a life of buying toys and having adventures."

The New Warrior Training Adventure and ManKind Project change men's lives. Simple as that.

Are you ready to risk change? Are you ready to stand with men who will see you and honor you and hold space for your change?

The time is now.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Journey of Tears

By Rick Canham; Manhawk, Shadow Warrior; Camp Krem, Sep 02

Wounded Soul, Empty of Spirit, A Man Stands Alone, It is His Time, One Step Forward, And Across the Carpet, in the Eyes of Another Man, he Sees the Powerful Presence of Connection and Strength, and he Begins to Feel Trust, Allowing him to Descend into the Abyss, Where in the Cold and Dark, on the Journey of Tears, He Will Face His Own Fear, Touch His Own Pain, and Challenge His Current Reality. Finally in His Moment of Truth, he Finds in Himself, the Power of Choice, and His Future, No Longer held Hostage and Forfeit to His Past. Now, Victorious and yet Humbled, He Will Forever Enjoy Proudly and Without Shame, the Salty Taste of his Own Tears as they Become, The River, in which He Will Cleanse His Newly Reborn Soul. Tears that Will Speak of His Connection to Self, and to All, and Hard Earned, they Will Not be Hidden from View, Nor Offered up, Apologetically as Weakness. They are Honored now, Shared Without Restriction, and Show his Willingness and Courage, to Guide and to Live, His Own Destiny Celebrate His Own Future, from this Moment Forward …

And Now, His Powerful Tears will say to Another Man “Trust Me, You Are Seen”, and as your Brother Warrior, I Would Be Honored to Stand Beside You, as You Journey into the Darkness, to Face Whatever Pain or Fear Lurks Within...

My Blood to Your Blood, My Soul to Your Soul, We Journey Together, You Are not Alone, And I Will Not Turn Away, Let Us Become One, and Powerful, and When Finally Beyond the Darkness, to the Safety of the Light and Warmth, We Will Dance, We Will Sing, We Will Laugh, For as Men, We have Shared a Journey Together...We Are Brothers, Never to be Alone Again, No Longer to be Separate, Lost Islands, in the River of Tears...Now as We Look to Each Other, We Feel the Strength of Our Connection, the Good of Our Dreams, and Together in Battle, We Found the Courage to Stand Before and to Face the Unknown in the Darkness...

True Power, and We Will Need It All, as in the Distance, Another Man Approaches, Hesitantly, His Shadow Large in Pain and Fear, and He Knows Not, Yet, that He is Safe With Us, And No Longer Alone. He Knows Not, Yet, that We, United, Will Now Stand Beside Him, and With Fierce Loving Support, Share his Journey and his Struggle, and that We Honor his Courage and Resolve to Reach Within, Challenge his Past, Touch his Future, and that We Will Now and Forever Be Known to him as, Brothers, in the Spirit of Loyal and Loving Strength...

And Finally, A Renewed Man, Opens his Eyes and his Heart, Breathes Life into his New Self, and His Dreams take Firm Root in a Future of His Own Choosing, and He Now Understands, And Quietly, Gently, He Nods, Grounded in His Own Power and Belief, A Fierce New Warrior Emerges, and He Now Turns, His Heart and His Hand, Offered, and He Now takes His Place in a Long Line of Brothers, and He, Will Make a Difference...

Far in the Distance, and Deep in Shadow, the Voice of yet Another Man, Cries Soulfully, Into the Dark, “ I Am Lost, Please Help Me “......and We Breathe Deeply in Resolve, We Await His Coming, We Stand Strong, and We Are Ready, and He is No longer Alone, and We Will Not Turn Away, We Will Not Turn Away...


Remembering; 8 Years Out

Remembering the loss, the day, the overwhelming sadness.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Staffing the NCal November NWTA, Part 2

An on-going series of posts around my staffing of the next MKP NWTA in Northern California. I thought it would be interesting and enlightening to follow how this all works and you'll get to ride along on what it looks like to put on an NWTA from one man's experience...mine.

Today, I sent in my "paperwork" to the man who handles all the administration for the NWTA I am staffing.

I needed to fill in an extensive medical form; the usual questions about my health and habits. Also, there's a section dealing with mental issues; depression, therapy, suicide, and the like. The attendees fill in the same form. All the forms are screened by an Medical Doctor for issues and flagged for follow-up, if need be. I signed it, no problem.

Another form around ethics and what I agree to around the attendees and the men I am staffing with. Basically, I agree to not enter into any financial, business, therapeutic, or sexual relationships with any man who does the training for six months. This is because men who attend the training may see me in the light of experience or power just because I am a "staff man." I signed it, no problem.

The last form was the standard liability release. Ya know, I fall down and get hurt, it's my deal. I signed it, no problem.

I did not send in the $100 fee, yet. I don't have it. I am asking my iGroup to financially help me get to the training. That's one of the great things I learned doing this work...ask for what I need. I am taking an 8% pay cut over the next year, so things are tight at my house. I have helped men get to the training as staff men and as attendees. And now, I am asking men to help me help other men. It's a wonderful thing.

Now, I wait to see what my part will be in the training and contact the other staff men to work out a carpool up to the training.

See you in part 3.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Staffing the NCal November NWTA, Part 1

An on-going series of posts around my staffing of the next MKP NWTA in Northern California. I thought it would be interesting and enlightening to follow how this all works and you'll get to ride along on what it looks like to put on an NWTA from one man's experience...mine.

I signed up to staff my third NWTA as a way to honor my tenth anniversary of my NWTA; October 10, 1999. I have staffed twice before; December 2001 and May 2003.

I got signed up just in time and waited for a week to hear if I was accepted to staff. I heard, via e-mail, that I have been added to the staff. So, here I am today, 64 days from the November NCal NWTA.

I feel grateful, honored, and have some fear about stepping into this training. I will be asking my IGroup men to help me with the cost. Each staff member pays a small fee to be of service to the men who are coming to their NWTA.

I am picturing the men who are coming to the training. I wonder if they feel the change coming? Do they feel the future changing in front of them? It is for me!

Catch you in part 2!

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Focus on You

"Focus on what's really important in life. Quality rather than appearance...ethics rather than rules...integrity rather than domination...knowledge rather than achievement...serenity rather than acquisitions."

Dr. Wayne Dyer

Focus....are you ready to focus on you? On what's really important to you?

Are you ready to step into a group of men who will hold space for you while you realize what you need to focus on?

Step in.

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Critic and the Doer

"It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat."

President Thoedore Roosevelt, Citizenship in a Republic, Speech at the Sorbonne, Paris, April 23, 1910


I am not here to say whether the ManKind Project will change you or make you a better man. I am not here to judge whether you are ready for change in your life? I am not here to be your wake up call to action.

I am here to share with you that the ManKind Project and the New Warrior Training Adventure have changed my life and made me a better man. I was ready for change in my life. I needed a wake up call to action.

I found it in this group of men; all types of sexual intentions, former addicts of all kinds and addicts in action, all colors and nationalities, all manner of religious and non-religious spirituality. I found it in a group of men that is so vast it is beyond compare.

You are one of those men, whether you know it or not. You are a man who can choose between the critic and the doer. What is your choice?

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf


Don't Lose Heart

"Don't lose heart, oh don't lose heart
Though it feels like yours will fall apart
Just remember when the road gets dark
I will always be beside you
Well, I will always be beside, beside you"

Dan Fogelberg, from Don't Lose Heart off the Portrait CD (1997)

In the ManKind Project, we stand beside other men to support them in their journey.

We listen, we stand aside, we offer some options that a man can take or leave, we hold the light up to a man so he can see how he shows up in the world, we sometimes laugh and sometimes cry and sometimes we just do nothing.

All in all, the ManKind Project is an entity of support and honor.

Are you interested in a group of men like this?

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf



"The group is about men finding their magnificence, their wonder, and their power. Yes, we look at all the parts of us and that includes looking at our shadows. In the end we are focused on knowing who we truly are and maximizing the best of us."

ManKind Project Four Stone Circle iGroup, Northern California

My ManKind Project iGroup, the Four Stone Circle, meets every Thursday night. It is the follow-up to the NWTA. What we do in the circle is continue to build on what was created for each of us in the training weekend.

For some men, it is getting into old pain or beliefs that hold them back. For others, it is about getting to know who they really are by letting go of being right or perfect or pretending to be who they aren't to be accepted by someone else. For others, it is getting what they need in a myriad of other ways.

The bottom line is, in the ManKind Project, there is support after the experiential NWTA weekend. There's a landing pad to go as far as you need to complete, or continue to make, whatever changes you feel are needed for you.

When will you stop making excuses not to attend?

I'm out.
Old-faithful Wolf